Disneyland employees -- or, rather "cast members" -- have a vocabulary all their own. The idea is that using a unique vocabulary will help maintain the special feeling of the park. Some examples:
adult = anyone over 10 years of age (as of April 2000).
attraction / adventure = show / ride. A pouty kid throwing herself on the floor in the Emporium because she can't buy a gigantic stuffed animal is an attraction. A trip in an ambulance is an adventure.
backstage / onstage = behind the scenes / in front of guests. A cast member must always be in character when on stage. Peter Pan must wait until he's backstage to admit that he's a girl.
cast member = CM = Disneyland park employee. Cast members aren't hired, they're cast, because Disneyland isn't a park, it's a "show." Annual pass holders who are in Disneyland every hour it's open every day are not cast members, they just think they are.
costume = uniform. A Winnie the Pooh outfit is a costume. A cast member puts on a costume before going out to sweep Main Street. A hasmat suit necessary when entering one of the more vile areas of the tunnels beneath the park is also a costume.
guest = customer. Customers are always right (guests aren't).
guest control = crowd control. Riot control is "additional guest control." Tear gas is "vision control."
health services = first aid. Along the same lines, the fire department is referred to as rapid oxidation services.
in character = a cast member acting the part they were hired to play. Mary Poppins saying she's "practically perfect" is "in character." Mary Poppins saying she's "probably pregnant" is "fired."
passport = ticket. Disneyland is technically a sovereign nation.
pre-show = line. During the summer, some attractions and adventures may have an excessively redundant, unscripted pre-show lasting several hours.
security host = park security officer. Security hosts are unarmed, but are trained to kill eight ways from a distance of ten feet (fifteen feet for supervisors). They are also sworn to give their lives before letting a child see that there is a person inside any costumed character.
virus = annual pass holder
At one time, Disneyland Resort management tried to convince cast members to talk only in Disnespeak when off stage. The effort was unsuccessful.
Want more lies?
Get the book!