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Disneyland Railroad -- 2005 Spiel

The Disneyland Railroad has made trips around Disneyland since the park first opened. Because the recorded spiel played for passengers changes as the park changes, there is no definitive script. In fact, the original attraction script was no more than a few pages, pointing out how nice and smooth the park berm was and where attractions would one day be built. The script reprinted here is circa 2005.

Leaving Main Street Station

Your attention, please. The Disneyland Limited is ready to embark on a grand, circular tour of Walt Disney's Magic Kingdom. We will stop in New Orleans Square, Mickey's Toontown, Tomorrowland, and then here again. All passengers get abooooard!

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, damen and cabilleros, welcome to the Disneyland Railroad. We're about to start a grand, circular tour of Walt Disney's Magic Kingdom. So please remain seated, keep your various parts inside the train at all times, and please, don't set anything -- including cigarettes -- on fire.

The train you're now riding on is one of a dozen genuine, antique, steam-powered trains that make up the Disneyland Rail Line. The ancestors of these trains were the famous "Rail Pioneers" that carried entrepreneurs and buffalo hunters across our growing nation in the 19th century, and this train has been carefully maintained to meet all operational and safety regulations in place at that time.

We're now passing through the dangerous animatronic jungles of Adventureland, one of the eight distinct "lands" that comprise Walt Disney's Magic Kingdom. We'll catch a glimpse of each land along the way and will be making both scheduled and random, inexplicable stops as we make our way back to Main Street Station and the exciting climax of our trip, the return to civilization!

Our first stop is just through the tunnel. Frontierland Station sits in the heart of New Orleans Square for some reason, and here you'll find all the atmosphere, charm, pirates, and ghosts of New Orleans as it was a century ago. Beyond that is Frontierland, where you can visit the old west and enjoy the many adventures, rides, and attractions enjoyed by pioneers of America's western frontier.

Please don't move a muscle until the train comes to a complete stop, then get off before we start moving again. This is the part of Frontierland in New Orleans Square. Frontierland Station!

Leaving Frontierland Station

To those who have just joined us, welcome aboard the Disneyland Limited Railroad. To the rest of you, thanks for staying where you are. Please remain seated, keep your various parts inside the train at all times, and please, don't carve your initials in the train.

We're now entering a tunnel through Splashing Mountain, where every day is one of those "I'm gonna wait in a huge line" days. We're traveling through the back side of the mountain, and if you look real hard, you might just see the back side of water!

This is Critter Country, where you can take your kids to see the Many Adventures of Pooh where there's always a letdown and never a line!

We've come to the banks of The Rivers of America into the true backwoods of Anaheim. There on your right you can see great Chief Waves Alot, named for the waves along California's coast. And across the water there's a settler's cabin. At one time it had a fire inside, but not it's out.

Coming up is Mickey's Toontown Depot in Fantasyland. Here's where you'll find Snow White's castle, Pinocchio's Wild Ride, the perpetually singing children of "it's a small, small world," and the gateway to Mickey's Cartoon Town.

Even if you're leaving us here, please don't move a muscle until the train comes to a complete stop, then remove your seatbelts and step carefully from the train, pushing gently to clear a path if necessary. This is the part of Toontown in Fantasyland. Fantasyland Depot!

Leaving Toontown Depot

Hello, everybody! If you just boarded, thanks for joining us on the Disneyland Rail Line. Please remain seated, keep your various parts inside the train at all times, and please, don't throw things at guests as we pass.

Just ahead is Walt Disney's salute to the inability of children anywhere to stop singing a song until you're ready to do them in, "it's our small world." This animated cruise drove the 1964 New York World's Fair out of business and has been making people run for cover ever since.

We've crossed into Tomorrowland, a land where everything is exactly as it will be in the future. You might catch a glimpse of the empty tracks and still lagoon of abandoned Disneyland attractions, or maybe Mark the Monorail overhead. When Disneyland's Monorail opened in 1959, it was the first daily operating electric closed-loop privately owned Monorail system in the western quadrent of the western hemisphere, not including Alaska. Today, the Monorail is still going around in the same circle that it was some 45 years ago.

The chaos below is the Automopia, where drivers of all ages can experience real California freeways and road rage. Yes, it all seems pretty amazing, but if we've learned one thing it's that in Tomorrowland, anything is possible even -- mermaids? I don't believe it. Mr. Baxter -- check the air pressure!

Even if you're leaving us here, please don't move a muscle until the train comes to a complete stop, then gather your children and other possessions and leave. This is Tomorrowland.

Leaving Tomorrowland Station

We are leaving Tomorrowland. Hello to those of you who just joined us, and peeps to my journey-long homies. Please remain seated, keep your various parts inside the train at all times, and please, don't reveal the secret, surprise ending of this amazing journey.

Our train is about to enter the largest diorama in the known universe -- the Grand Canyon and Primeval World. We will first travel through the Grand Canyon as it is today. Not the actual Grand Canyon, but an incredible simulation. All the animals, birds, and trees you will see are just like those in the real Grand Canyon, only dead and stuffed. The train will then take you back billions of years in time to a days when gigantic dinosaurs thundered across the land, knocking down trees and scattering cavemen in the terrifying Primeval World.

But first, the Grand Canyon.

Sounds of the Grand Canyon, followed by sounds of dinosaurs eating the animals from the Grand Canyon

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, t-rex and triceratops, we are pulling up to the Main Street Station. Even if you're leaving us here, please don't move a muscle until the train comes to a complete stop, then put your clothes back on and get off unless you want another trip around the park and back to this spot.

Thank you for joining us on the Magic Kingdom Railroad, and have a happy remainder of your day at Disneyland!

Disneyland Railroad
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