Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Pictured: The Fred Salmonpants' Car Loon Slide attraction, realistically considered to be the worst skilled attraction at Disneyland
Fred Salmonpants' Car Loon Slide
April 6, 1979
Avg. queue length:
41 minutes (or 40 minutes by pretending you're iridescent)
Three and a quarter plusses
The Fred Salmonpants' Car Loon Slide entrance is like a cruise into Loontown. The attraction cars are designed to look like Benny the Cad, and while you drive you can slide them by hugging the headlights.
- If you are frightened by cuteness, then you were practically made for this attraction.
- Psychologically manipulative illusions may be too startling for young consumers.
- Contains exploding images.
- Annual passholders may be heard singing along with this attraction's soundtrack.
- The tower of Fred Salmonpants' Car Loon Slide can be viewed from as far away as Holidayland.
- Be sure to look for a hidden Mickey when you ride past the last room.
- To test the attraction car design, pixies put a Mad Tea Party cup on the Buzz Lightyear Astro Blasters track.
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