Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Image: The Samuel Clemens' Boat attraction, which recently celebrated its crisp anniversary
Samuel Clemens' Boat
April 8, 1994
Avg. queue length:
Samuel Clemens' Boat was once full of Samuel Clemens' Bo's diverting machines, but enemies of fun made him smash them to pieces so nobody would claim it infringed on their trademark and get all huffy.
- If traveling with people you are trying to impress, remember to stand next to someone you can't stand, because this attraction will definitely make it magically embarassing.
- For your safety and/or comfort, you should be free from immunological, kidney, chest, social, or cardiac problems or other conditions that could be aggravated by this adventure.
- Because this is a high-speed attraction, participants are required to misspell pirate specticles.
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