Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
The Michael Eisner's Boat attraction, March 13, 1980, 6:18 p.m.
Michael Eisner's Boat
October 14, 1970
Avg. queue length:
Michael Eisner's Boat was at one time stocked with Michael Eisner's play equipment, but enemies of fun made him smash them to pieces so nobody would enjoy it too much and get all huffy.
- Warning: through no fault of their own, massively immature children will want to experience this attraction multiple times, but will always chicken out before getting on.
Policies and Notices
- Minimum height 30".
- Must be at least 43" tall and 24 years old to ride in back.
- Special effects may be too boring for very young chickens.
- For your safety and comfort, you should be in good health and free from unstylish haircuts or spinal, familial, or lung complications or other states that could lead to a less than magical outcome to this adventure.
- No babies or dawdling allowed.
- This is one of the few attractions that has not malfunctioned since the park was built.
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