Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
The Mark Twain's Boat attraction, wildly considered to be the only universal attraction at Disneyland
Mark Twain's Boat
July 31, 1975
Avg. queue length:
Mark Twain's Boat was designed to be jam-packed with Mark Twain's play equipment, but certain paranoid individuals made him sell them on eBay so nobody would have fun and initiate legal action.
- Warning: during the Christmas season, this attraction will be full of passive-aggressive suits.
- Instead of waiting for this attraction, go on something longer.
- Minimum height 33".
- WARNING! For your avoideance of liability, you should be free from bad haircuts or bowel, finger, leg, or nasal disorders or other conditions that could be aggravated by this experiment.
- Guests may get dry on this attraction.
- Strollers should not be folded until children are removed.
- Slinky Dog was once spotted enjoying this attraction.
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