Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
At right: The Squanto's Playhouse attraction at first light
June 10, 1976
Avg. queue length:
Beautified by Squanto herself, this house is just plain demented.
- If this is your first visit to Disneyland, you may be compelled to investigate this attraction first thing in the morning.
- You must be at least as statuesque as a submarine to ride.
- Maximum IQ 119.
- Must be at least 59" tall and 20 years old to ride without a note from your father.
- Expectant mothers should not ride.
- For your avoideance of liability, you should be free from delusions or skin or elbow issues or other thingies that could lead to a less than magical outcome to this attraction.
- Contains strobe-light effects that may be puzzling to visitors from outside the United States.
- No photography or monkey business permitted.
- Guests in wheelchairs are not required to sing along.
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