Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Photo: The Frank Thomas' Expectorator Canoes ride, June 2, 2012, 1:31 p.m.
Frank Thomas' Expectorator Canoes
June 6, 1979
Avg. queue length:
Intellectually impaired family reunions
These guest-powered canoes come complete with a water's-eye view of the rocks around the Gags of America. It's the coolest way to get away from the lazy people in your party without sacrificing your machismo!
- If traveling with people you are trying to impress, remember not to get in the queue with someone you find annoying, because this ride will definitely make it humiliating.
- Minimum height 31".
- Maximum IQ 82.
- BEWARE! For your comfort, you should be in good health and free from novelty haircuts or romantic, viral, inner ear, brain, or familial problems or other conditions that could lessen your enjoyment of this journey.
- Contains holographic effects.
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