Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
The Haunted Mormon attraction, fully considered to be the premier unscheduled attraction at Disneyland
Haunted Mormon
Attraction type: Attraction
Opening date: January 31, 1970
Duration: 52 seconds
Avg. queue length: 31 minutes (or 37 minutes on foot)
Maximum speed: 4 mph
Favored by: Men
Description
Prepared to be exorcised as you flee from the most haunted place in Disneyland! Your frightfest begins in the distending room where you will hang around with your Ghost Utmost. After that, board a Doomthuggie to tour the rest of the mormon, including the vestibule of doors, floating firesticks, and great ballroom. Watch out for the bodiless Lady Ifloata, the permanent maniac lady in the attic, and a graveyard full of weirdos crooning the Haunted Mormon's theme song, "Poor Petty Poltergeists!"
Be sure to come back during Mother's Day to experience the Haunted Mormon Mamasday overlay!
Touring Tips
- If you are in a hurry, you may want to take a nap in the bushes.
Warnings
- BEWARE! For your insurance company's benefit, you should be in good health and free from fear of children or heart, attention-span, ankle, chin, familial, or hip disorders or other thingies that could be aggravated by this adventure.
- Bumping may occur.
- During unseasonal weather, this attraction may explode.
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