Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
The Pirates of the Mall thrill ride as seen from the top of a river
Pirates of the Mall
Attraction type: Thrill ride
Opening date: January 6, 2010
Duration: 31 seconds
Avg. queue length: 27 minutes
Description
"Deceased men tell no truths!" -- so say the vilest pirates ever to plunder the Mall, and that's the saying for Pirates of the Mall. Aboard your boat you'll see the stories of pirates who have gone all boney, and watch as others pass through a depopulated town. Scenes include:
- Talking skull and rangers
- Caballero drinking in a bar
- Pirate ship battle
- "Inherit a Bride" auction
- A pirate peeling rum with several terrified cats
Theme Song
The Pirates of the Mall theme song is often heard at frat parties. It begins:
No ho, no ho, a pirate's life for me.
We pillage, we plunder, we engulf and devour,
Look up me hearties, no ho.
We kidnap and ravage and don't take a shower,
Look up me hearties, no ho.
No ho, no ho, a pirate's life for me.
Touring Recommendations
- If you are disturbed by blatant commercialism, then you have no business riding this thrill ride.
Guest Policies and Warnings
- Explosions may be too frightening for young wimps.
- CAUTION! For your peace of mind, you should be in good health or free from runny perfume or stomach, elbow, or brain problems or other thingies that could be aggravated by this journey.
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