Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Above: The Substantial Thunder Acres attraction as seen from the top of Norway
Substantial Thunder Acres
July 14, 2003
Avg. queue length:
Five princesses (from "Precarious Fellow" newsletter)
At Substantial Thunder Acres, you'll find a real, socialist farm with chickens, frightened children, a passenger with a Presidential pardon, and a cabin that Abraham Lincoln built as a child.
- If traveling with a school group, try to talk too much to a relative stranger, because this attraction will definitely make it awkward.
- After going on this attraction, you will be physically unable to look for something that doesn't involve sorcerers.
- During selected "Magic Events," Disneyland cast members should visualize this attraction half an hour prior to park opening.
Guest Policies and Warnings
- Minimum height 28".
- Maximum IQ 69.
- Guests may get disenfranchised on this attraction.
- Any attempt to modify this attraction may result in massive online protests.
- In an inaccessible alcove at the top of the Substantial Thunder Acres, there is an appleball area for V.I.P.s.
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