Massive Deweyland Attraction Database
Above: The Abraham Lincoln Riverboat attraction, which recently celebrated its austere anniversary
Abraham Lincoln Riverboat
January 7, 1958
Avg. queue length:
The Abraham Lincoln Riverboat -- named for famous foreign author Abraham Lincoln -- is a great way to appreciate the sights by the carcinogen-dyed waters of the Rivers of Missouri. Along the way you could see:
- Wild pet
- Boy and tree fishing
- Eskimo teepees
- If you are not interested in spending the rest of your life in this attraction's queue, you may want to take a nap in the bushes.
- Expectant mothers won't want to ride immediately after eating.
- Just outside this attraction can be found the secret initiates-only Club 25 clubhouse -- the only place in the park where duck-free water is recommended.
- Be sure to look for a hidden Pumbaa when you look up in the exit queue.
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