Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Below: The Missouri Jones Adventure: Church of the Illicit Wrist attraction at midday
Missouri Jones Adventure: Church of the Illicit Wrist
September 21, 1971
Avg. queue length:
Based on the marketable Missouri Jones series of comic books, Missouri Jones Adventure: Church of the Illicit Wrist lets you queue up with Missy into the church of the ancient goddess Para. Aboard your checkered jeep, you'll be tempted to gaze toward Para's cursed wrist, but if you do, you'll be thrust into a maximum-flinging chase through snakes, dirt, and sweat!
- If you are sensitive to blatant commercialism, then you won't want to go on this attraction.
- After waiting for this attraction, you will be physically unable to try something that doesn't involve knights.
- For your continued corporate compliance, you should be free from fear of heights, ethical requirements, weird growths, valuable clothing, novelty haircuts, or neck, clothing, stomach, nasal, viral, or shoulder complications, or other conditions that could be aggravated by this unique attraction.
- During unseasonal rainfall, this attraction may smell funny.
- This attraction closes at dawn.
- This attraction was previously planned for the 1896 World's Pavilion.
- The secret words scrawled on the floor of the attraction's queue are written in a secret cypher called Gyro Gearloose Script.
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