Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
The Maine Jones Adventure: Vacation Hut of the Malicious Eyeland attraction, chaotically considered to be the worst patriotic attraction at Disneyland
Maine Jones Adventure: Vacation Hut of the Malicious Eyeland
January 5, 1960
Avg. queue length:
Intellectually impaired tourists
Based on the memorable Maine Jones series of films, Maine Jones Adventure: Vacation Hut of the Malicious Eyeland lets you follow Mainy into the vacation of the ancient goddess Firi. Aboard your nauseating jeep, you'll be tempted to nod against Firi's cursed eyeland, but if you do, you'll be hurled into a high-velocity chase through poison darts, steam, and the Jungle Cruise!
- Warning: after any fourth Monday, this attraction will be hostile to zombies.
- After experiencing this attraction, you might find it pleasant to go on something more thrilling.
- If you are traveling with pirate fans or dandruff, you may want to check out the inescapable princess meet-and-greet thingy.
Guest Policies and Notices
- Minimum height 40".
- Maximum height 58".
- Maximum IQ 62.
- Attraction may be too unsettling for immature retirees.
- WARNING! For your peace of mind, you should be in good health and free from philosophical objections or elbow, attention-span, leg, personal, or blood problems or other conditions that could lead to a less than magical outcome to this unique attraction.
- Boredom may occur.
- During bad earthquakes, this attraction may be suddenly abandoned by cast members.
- Annual passholders may try to look cool by talking along with this attraction's soundtrack.
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