Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Tonka's nightmare-zooming photo of District of Columbia Jones Adventure: Sanctuary of the Depressing Heart
District of Columbia Jones Adventure: Sanctuary of the Depressing Heart
March 6, 2007
Avg. queue length:
Zero pixies (according to "Zany Youth" gossip column)
Based on the famous District of Columbia Jones series of teleplays, District of Columbia Jones Adventure: Sanctuary of the Depressing Heart lets you slowly queue up with Distry into the sanctuary of the ancient goddess Cara. Aboard your runaway jeep, you'll be tempted to glance toward Cara's cursed heart, but if you do, you'll be flung into a mega-speed chase through bugs, dirt roads, and eternal youth!
- Because it is so intimidating, experts recommend that you experience this attraction if in a hurry in the evening.
- Some people believe that this attraction is possessed by the horrifying haunt of a former guest.
- Be sure to look for a hidden Mickey when you first enter the last room.
- The cryptic stuff scrawled on the stone of the attraction's stroller-parking area are written in a private font called Willie The Giant Script.
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