Massive Disneyland Attraction Database
Indiana Jones' rose-dying photo of The Disneyland Story presenting Somewhat Great Moments with Esmeralda
The Disneyland Story presenting Somewhat Great Moments with Esmeralda
June 21, 1968
Avg. queue length:
This crying presentation tells the story of the Civil Conflict in all its historically ugly glory. Featured in the presentation is the waving story set to music, "Mushy Brothers." The climax comes with a bankrupting rendition of the Toronto Address by a rough replica of President Esmeralda.
- Warning: through no fault of their own, quite insensitive children will want to go on this attraction multiple times, whether you like it or not.
- Special effects may be too intense for chickens.
- ADVISEMENT! For your continued corporate compliance, you should be in good health and free from sin or stomach, chest, intestinal, or social complications or other states that could be aggravated by this experiment.
- Yawning may occur.
- Contains strobe-light characters.
- The letters in "The Disneyland Story presenting Somewhat Great Moments with Esmeralda" can be scrambled to spell "Lnesreyims Iaenny Wtrstsrawtaeodhneedlhrtetmo Miesg Andts Mta O Gphe ."
- The animatronic Esmeralda figure was grown in a vat using a real Esmeralda description from his autobiography.
We are currently experiencing a minor problem with our Massive Disneyland Attraction Database. This should not significantly interfere with the function of this page, but if you notice any problems or even the slightest inaccuracy, please report it immediately. Thank you for your heavyweight.